Hey, I heard the Huskers have moved to the Big Ten.
I can't tell you exactly when I first heard this juicy little tidbit.
But then I heard it again. Andagainandagainandagain.
Actually, I first heard they were thinking of moving to the Big Ten. Then that they likely were moving to the Big Ten. And then that they were definitely -- or 99.9 percent sure, if Dr. Tom had anything to do with it -- moving to the Big Ten.
And then? They actually MOVED to the Big Ten. And I thought, well, that's that.
But it wasn't. Next came the loooong goodbye to that old conference we were in, what was it called? The Big 12 (which now has 10 teams).
And now the loooong hello to the new conference (called the Big Ten, with 12 teams.)
I know 99.9 percent of the state is gorging on the encyclopediazation of this grand new change in our lives, and I'm happy for the eager hordes. Perhaps there will be an All Big Ten Jeopardy coming our way soon.
For me? Information overload.
It's like listening to your dad lecture at the supper table: His lips are moving (andmovingandmoving) and you haven't heard a word since "Now listen ..."
I've heard so much about the Big Ten that I couldn't tell you one single thing about the Big Ten except we will be playing a lot of sports (football) with teams (football) that generally are located farther away from Nebraska than Kansas.
And none of them is Texas.
Oh, and that there are 23,000 Nebraskans (at least) who want the 3,000 tickets allotted to them for the Wisconsin (football) game. And I only know this because one of them is my daughter.
Oh, and, yes, I FULLY REALIZE it's not just the football team and its red-clad worshippers changing conferences to stimulate the (football) fan base.
The whole university has joined Bo and Carl.
There are important things, like the opportunity for greater academic excellence, involved.
I know this because I read a lot of stories about that, too. (Full disclosure: I read some of the stories and all of the headlines.)
I'm sure there are a million or more Nebraskans who could name all 12 members of the Big Ten Conference and their mascots, along with each school's research budgets and the average ACT scores of incoming freshmen.
OK. Maybe not the research budgets. Or the test scores. But definitely the mascots.
I'm betting that half of Nebraska knows more about the University of Minnesota than the University of Minnesota knows about the University of Minnesota.
For the past 14 months, my fellow Nebraskans have been inundated with everything they need to know about 11 schools in eight states. We've heard about fight songs, art museums, favorite movies, burger joints, the price of parking tickets at Purdue and the cost of muenster in Madison.
It's been like sitting in a dark theater, watching the world's longest movie trailer. Or wanting a small chocolate sundae with whipped cream -- no nuts -- and getting the World's Biggest Banana Split.
Or watching an Amish couple court. Just kiss the girl, already.
It's not that I don't care.
It's just that I don't care as much as many people appear to care.
Or even half that much.
But I'm happy that so many people seem to be following the journey so carefully. It shows spirit and vigor and gumption and the willingness to embrace change.
And they say change is good. And that the Big Ten in general is pretty good. And that Wisconsin is pretty good, too.
At least that's what I've heard, I think. Or would have heard, had I still been listening.