• If you ever discover you're a character in a Stephen King story, here are 16 ways to survive the endeavor. AV Club

• 13 of nature's most vile parasites. Come for the Filarial worm. Stay for the Candiru. Web Ecoist

• 36 percent of Americans will recycle an old gift this Christmas. Chicago Tribune

• Retirement will make you feel 10 years younger, healthier, says study. Especially if your boss is a jerk. The Daily Mail

• Strange days: Hilarious Twitter feed S**t My Dad Says gets optioned by CBS for sitcom. Mashable

• Newsweek has begun a cool flash feature called "The Decade in Rewind," in which the mag runs down several "top 10 of the decade" lists. Lists include: top 10 worst predictions, top 10 accidental celebrities, top 10 cultural moments. Newsweek

• 20 worst men's hairstyles. I don't know, I think "the Robert Pattinson" style looks kind of cool. I WISH my hair could do that. Manolith

• Apparently something can be lame, awesome and practical all at once: the human sleeping bag. The Coolist

• 10 reasons the world won't end in 2012. John Cusack = liar! Discovery News

• Amen, Batman. My Confined Space

• The most and least expensive college towns. Forbes

• New poster of Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland" is just about as terrifying as you would expect. /Film

IN ADORABLE ANIMAL NEWS:

• Deer kids love puddles! The Daily Bitch

• Cat boxing. Stupid Videos