Lincoln newbie says: What’s up with traffic here?
Thanks to everyone for the advice on all things drink, food and fun in my new hometown. If I take you all up on your suggestions, I’ll surely put on some pounds and rack up a few misdemeanors.
However, I now realize just how absurdly difficult it can be to drive around Lincoln. As far as I can tell, this town contains more stoplights than it does citizens. I’ve driven in Wichita, Kansas City, Dallas and Denver, and I’ve never spent so much time staring at red lights.
To help curb this problem, I’m taking a cue from the United Parcel Service. According to a recent New York Times article, UPS drivers have saved a lot of gallons and dollars by not making left turns. The company told the drivers of its 95,000 brown blocky trucks to not idle at left turns and plan routes to include right turns. And it’s resulted in big savings. UPS spokeswoman Heather Robinson said the company cut 28.5 million miles off its delivery routes last year. It’s since saved about 3 million gallons of gas and reduced carbon dioxide emissions by 31,000 metric tons.
Now, I alone can’t save such a grand amount of petrol by avoiding left turns. But I could save a lot of time and aggravation.
So I’ve since adopted this method, making mental maps of right-turn-heavy routes. And I’ve noticed Lincoln’s roads make it quite easy to follow this philosophy. Because of the near ubiquitous road medians, I’m forced to turn right out of almost every parking lot not off a one-way. I’ve also quit turning left off R Street onto 27th Street — a nerve-jangling turn on which I’ve nearly caused two wrecks. I’ve since noticed a “No left turn” sign at this intersection. Sound advice.
But despite my newfangled right-turn doctrine, I’m still perpetually punching the roof of my car because of traffic-related stress. And mostly, it’s the fault of parking-space parasites, a species of human I didn’t know existed but is apparently indigenous to this area. I waited at two stoplights the other day as a guy idled in an intersection waiting for someone to pull out of a parking space on P Street. I realize downtown parking is sparse round the block, but that’s just plain inconsiderate.
But other than that, so far, Lincoln’s aces.
— Send more ideas for what Micah Mertes should do to learn more about Lincoln to mmertes@journalstar.com.

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